Author Archives: lovesoulsandmusic

About lovesoulsandmusic

This blog is the story of how after many years of difficult and seemingly impossible relationships across the world I finally actually found the person I am living a real-love and always-in-movement and development relationship. Through my story I hope I can inspire others to know that you also can create a relationship where to find real joy and happiness. How and why I know that he is the person I will be with the rest of my life, and how you can know it too. And maybe, give you some hints about how I fell into traps that were leading me to desperation and in some situations also denigration, feeling attracted by men that will not bring me development and real love.

Fathers day, mother’s day, love day…

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Why do you think we need all those reminders?

Marketers found out before the rest of the population that there was something missing and they created a product to satisfy this missing piece of the puzzle.

It is all very well organize: there is no family time or time to build relationship in our own houses because we need to work a lot to have houses that will contain all the things the society is telling us we need. But what happen with our health? With our relationships? With our development as human beings? With our children? They learn from us what is important and what is not. When money is our direction, money will remind us when to love and how. And money has many faces: cloths, cars, houses, status… 

Do you want to satisfy them or create  life in which you are able to remember by yourself those days?

Why?

Because if you realize, these days can be everyday. 

Everyday is THE DAY to give a hug to my partner, take him to a walk in the forest and share with him all the smiles in the world, jokes, caring, cuddling…

Everyday is THE DAY to support him in his development

Everyday is THE DAY to cook together or for each other

Everyday is THE DAY to call my mother and tell her I love her

Everyday is THE DAY to draw a picture with a big smile in it and write sentences that will make her smile

Everyday is THE DAY to talk soft and loving to my partner, even if we don’t agree in a subject

Everyday is THE DAY to offer a different point of view and work on it together

Everyday is THE DAY to build my relationship with the people I love, to care for them, support them, hug them, show them I love them and share with them my life.

Everyday is THE DAY to sing a song together: friends, partner…

Everyday is THE DAY to do silly things together that will make us smile (not on the expenses of others, always respecting everyone)

Everyday is THE DAY to help the ones we love develop and do new steps, overcome fears…

Everyday is THE DAY to overcome whatever will come with a smile and jokes.

Everyday is THE DAY for whatever you want to build in your life.

" I need a very big box to be able give the present to my father" A real present for every day

” I need a very big box to be able give the present to my father” A real present for every day

If your life means money, this is what you will have in your life. But check if the price for that is your life itself, because most of the times this is the price. 

With love,

Laura

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Confessions from a blogger

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Hi all!

I want to share with you all my thoughts, because these thoughts have blocked me from writing in this blog. Have blocked me from sharing with you what I really love to share, my experience in life. Because I know that they can help many people to see that other life is possible.

I could start saying that… I am in a very very very busy period of my life. But as far as I see the future coming and the way I have decided to deal with my life, it will not change 🙂 So this excuse it is no more than that: an excuse.

The real reason is that I have had many thoughts related to the excellence of the blog. In the moment I saw the blog was starting to receive more visitors my mind started to be full of…

“I really need to give good stuff to this people! They are investing their time on my blog”

“I really need to prepare the posts well”

“My English… it is probably not so good. Probably people is feeling that I am not good in writting”

“I cannot be boring, I need to really do interesting posts to engage them from the begining!! There so many amazing bloggers!!”

Did it ever happen to you, blogger, writer, “sharer“, …?

It cannot continue like this.

This blog is my voice. A voice that is sharing with love her experience in life. In a life that before wasn’t that good at all. A voice that want to show to other people that they can be happier in their life’s , in their relationships, wit their kids… I am not going to let these discouraging voices to stop me writing what it can help to so many people.

I had even thoughts about sharing this with all of you, but it is time to continue my journey, go over them and show my presence with all my love here again. 

So I just declare to all who will read me that I am not ashamed if my English is not perfect, if the topics are not interesting enough or whatever else!

This is my voice: clear, loving, and strong. Sharing from my heart to all of you many of my experiences, intimacies and thoughts.

Because, at the end, what is perfection?

From my heart I feel that perfection is the reflection of the light that our souls bring to every creature. Perfection is constant development. Perfection is movement. Perfection is a smile, a respectful joke, a nice comment, a hand to someone who needs it, a protest against an injustice, a decision to love, a kiss, a hug… Surrounded by so many perfections, there is no place for any of these blocking thoughts 🙂

Thank you all for listening -reading,

With love,

Laura

PS: if someone feels like sharing something from their experiences in life wit their partners, kids, just in their lifes… I will be very glad to hear from you!!

 

girasol-y-mariposa-sunflower-and-butterfly

Another specie in risk of extinction

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In nature we find constant examples in which different beings help each other to develop and move their lives forward together, in harmony and cooperation.

Cooperation in Nature crocodile-plover - Clown fish

One of the examples is the clown fish and the anemone that while the clown fish can save the anemone from being eaten by other fish, the anemone hides and protects also the fish and gets nutrients from its feces. In the case of the plover bird and the crocodile, the bird feeds himself with the larvae and other leaches that he can find in the mouth of the crocodile while the crocodile receives a spa-dentist treatment from the bird. It is not an easy decision to stay in between the teeth of a crocodile, but it looks like the plover’s trust and braveness provide him with a natural supermarket and a win-win agreement.

Cooperation in Nature crocodile-plover

Groups of whales or dolphins many times cooperate together for a meal that will benefit the whole group. Trees many times are whole communities of living creatures that directly o indirectly benefit from each other in a pretty balance relationship.

lichen tree beech-forest

The examples are many and very diverse.

What’s happening then with us, human beings?

It looks like that even in our own houses and families competitiveness is the only thing that have space. (Many times in a very hidden and subtle way, but it is there in the background). Communication is almost a myth in most of the families (in my original family was not even a myth; It simply didn’t exist).

So, with this family picture, where is cooperation? Is it even part of the family o couples dictionary?

But, on the other hand, did anyone teach us how to create a cooperative relationship or family?

It looks like that, as humans, we are not able to create a real cooperation even between couples that we choose by ourselves.

Don’t you think that there is something wrong here?

Almost of my live I was observing very closely different families, trying to find a balanced family, and the truth is that I found one or two that were having a kind of nice relationship between the members, but there was not a real bond in between all of them. It was more from maternal, paternal or fraternal sense of obligation towards each other than from a real loving-cooperative place. I couldn’t understand why it was so difficult for families to create an environment for all-members real developments. Actually, I couldn’t even imagine that something like this could exist.

How to find harmony? From does the cooperation in nature comes?

Many people will say that from survival. But, don’t you think that we are in the same survival mode? From my point of view, families are almost an extinct species.

I just want to offer few numbers to give an estimation of what we are talking about. In Canada the rate of divorce in 2012 was 40% and in Sweden 55%. 35% of children in Canada will be affected by divorce.

It has been estimated that over 40% of all living species on Earth are at risk of going extinct.

We know that the planet is in a difficult situation. But not only the planet also all its inhabitants, as we can see.

We can see that families are “in danger”. Don’t you think that if we continue in this line of competition the human race -as something more than an angry and grey existence- is already in critical danger?

It is considered a LIFE to spend our time fighting in and out of our homes?

Is it, at least, the LIFE that we want to LIVE?

When we will be 80 years old and we will look behind, what will be the life that we will see? What will be will the picture of our existence? How do we want it to look like?

I would be very happy if some people would like to share what do they think about it.

I the next post I will try to give you more food for thoughts.

With love,

Laura

The Circle of Losing my Life by trying to find a real PARTNER

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I have spent most of my life single and when I was sharing my life with someone I had the “tendency” to choose the wrong ones. The ones who didn’t give me support, didn’t want to share the same direction, didn’t accept my strength, were trying to control me in different ways… Even though in many cases they were applying this control in such a subtle way that was almost impossible to notice it. So when I was in a relationship I was investing almost all my energy in making it work.

And the times I was single, I was spending all my energy in trying to find a partner.

I invite you to check

                                          “The Circle of Losing Our Lives through our Partnerships”

The circle or losing our lives...

Do you feel you are in any of these stages?

We are born with tones of energy –vital energy, I mean. Along our life when we find a partner that cannot contribute to our life in a deep level of development and we cannot contribute to their life in the same level of development, sooner or later we will feel that something is not working. Years and years will pass and we will see ourselves in a constant search and try like in a laboratory, trying to find the right formula, or in a relationship that can move from not that bad, just boring to drama partnership. In between there are many other options, most of them not very appealing.

The educational system, the media, the TV, the romantic movies… show again and again a fake picture of what is life as a couple, what is love… And even when we try not to believe what they say (which is an extra effort), it is so much in our blood that it is almost impossible not to be affected and directed by this pattern.

I invite you to look to your parents, the friends of your parents, the parents of your friends, inside your family… Look for couples or singles at their 50’s when they have lived their lives enough years to see how painful and frustrating is not to have side by side the right person. They have already created a family –in most of the cases- and at this point, their children don’t really want to spend a lot of time with their parents, family time and family meetings are something that is better not to have very often if they want to keep breathing, they –as partners- are tired of life, and trying to look for something that will bring some joy to their lives they are dreaming with having grandchildren… “For sure a baby will bring some smiles and warmth…” they think to themselves.

For many years I was observing closely different families that were part of my surrounding. I was looking for my dream of finding the SECRET for a HEALTHY family in which their members would really help each other, support each other, love each other and share a common development.

I couldn’t find it. Not even one of the families in my surrounding were deeply happy. Life is hard, many will think. It is more than that. It is not a matter of how hard is life.

It is a matter of learning. No one, ever, taught us how to build a relationship, how to develop with our partner, how to find out when is not a person for us, how to find the person that will match our hearts and souls.

And in this process of trying and trying and trying and trying our lives are passing and sooner or later we will not have the energy to build anything, to create anything new, to support anyone or to even try to find anyone anymore. And in this process we will finally release part of ourselves or even we will release completely ourselves. And this will be like disappearing, like not existing anymore.

Have you ever thought before how much is affecting us to find the right person?

But, how can we find them? If you already read some of my posts probably you will imagine the answer… if not, maybe now is a good moment to take some minutes and read them 😉 And if you prefer to wait a bit, in some days I will explain you my personal experience, that is also the experience of several of my friends.

Here you might find some answers 🙂  http://www.healaura.com/aura-blog

Thank you for reading me.

See you soon!

With love,

Laura

A “Simple” discussion… (Part 2)

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The same situation?

                                                                       A different approach?

Creating a new reality for both together

                                                                                  Let’s see together

Communication instead of persuation

                                                               Communication instead of persuasion

Looking at the big picture together

     Looking at the big picture together

Opening a new place where to try new things

                                                        Opening a new space where to try new things

For many people this second part can look like a representation of a couple that have a good relationship or even like the picture of a good day in a regular relationship. But if you look deeper into the situation you will see that in this second option about the same situation there are some significant differences:

  • CREATION: Both partners are ready to release their own ideas and look for an option that will help in the development of both. The reason is not because they are very good people. The reason is that they work as a unit of energy for the development of both. They know that both will win in such situation.
  • There is COMMUNICATION instead of persuasion, which almost 100% of the times imply manipulation.
  • FLEXIBILITY
  • OPENNESS to include any change if needed, any new option can be an option.
  • DEVELOPMENT: They decide to do an activity that will bring support and development to both of them instead of choosing a “spending-time activity”. This kind of activities direct the people to let the time pass in a more entertained way but don’t bring any support to their lives or any help to move their life forward. Our two lovely couple go further and look for something that will nurture their lives. And with this I  don’t mean that it has to be going to a museum or do “intellectual” activities. It doesn’t mean that at all. There are many activities like what I showed you some posts ago that can help both to develop and have good time together. You can read it in: Everything started with a long hair… 🙂
  • And much more!

One of the main things that makes a difference is that in this second comic there is CHANNELING. This channeling brought them in few moments alternatives they didn’t think about before about. Combinations that blew their minds up! Combinations directed to make them happier people, more smiley, more creative people…

Don’t you think that channeling is amazing? It is like having your own guide with you all the time, ready to help at any time. Ready to show you what you cannot see with your own eyes. And it is an ability that everybody can learn!

But I don’t want to convince you about anything, just share how the relationship approach, since I am able to connect with my aura has changed to better in a really significant way.

Now I create my relationship from very creative places day by day. There is always something new. Routine is a word that is not part of our relationship dictionary 🙂 (and this is also applicable to our intimate time… maybe this will be for another post 😉 )

Thank you for reading it!

With love,

Laura

PS: by the way, both comics are a real reflection of how things were solved and planned in my last relationships and now. The “Now” picture is the one related to channeling, the second part 🙂 and I would never want to change it for the first part of a Simple discussion…

A “Simple” discussion… (Part 1)

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In my past relationships I was “discussing” things with my partner all the time. The picture of this situations was more or less as I describe below…

In our couple life we are constantly making decisions: the plan for the weekend, the education of the kids, the way we will spend you vacation the clothes we want for our bed, the house that will buy or rent…

What happen when we don’t agree with what our partner brings or want?

Is that simple?

Is that simple?

1. After exposing our plans we try to convince one another and show how good is the idea we have. Most of the times this conversations, more or less intense, involve certain degree of manipulation. We are usually not aware of it. Manipulation is so much in our day by day that it doesn’t call our attention anymore when it sneaks in between our words.

I am sure you are gonna like it...

I am sure you are gonna like it…

2. After considering the scenario one yield and let the partners idea go ahead and be the “winner”. At least for this time, for this week…

“Ok, we will do your plan this time, but next week is my turn.” In the background many times the thought is: I don’t like to do it a t all, but I am willing to suffer for you… that intense is my love…”

And the winning’s partner thoughts can be something like: “my partner really loves me! He/she is willing to suffer for me! To give in his/her ideas! It is so romantic…” 

My Plan. I was sure he would like it...

My Plan

3. The Day D: The “winner” is not happy, cannot enjoy the day D because his/her partner is not enjoying. Both can feel something heavy is in the atmosphere even if the partner is trying his/her best to enjoy.

A new thought come the winning’s partner mind: “THE LOVE he feels for me might not be strong enough to make him enjoy just by being with me?”

His Plan

His Plan.

4. The week after: The new “winner” doesn’t enjoy either. His partner is not enjoying.

“Maybe our love is not that strong…”

“Maybe we need a break…”

“Maybe I need more time with my friends…”

“Maybe…”

I didn't find THE ONE yet...

I didn’t find THE ONE yet…

5. “Maybe…He is not the one”

“Maybe … She is not the one”

They stay in the same place they where, same plans… the partner once is now an ex-partner. And the idea is: He/she wasn’t the one.

Did you ver think in this situations that it might be that we don’t know how to create partnership?

. . . . . . . . . . . . . .

And again, we go back to an endless circle of loneliness.

We go back to the circle of endless searching for the RIGHT PARTNER, THE ONE.

We go back to the feeling of: what’s wrong with me? Why I cannot find a partner?

But did ever anyone teach you or show you how to find the right partner?

How to CREATE a healthy relationship?

How many people  in your surroundings have a healthy and supportive relationship with their partners?

My partner wants to contribute to this post by adding:

“So, what did we see here? Each person had their own plan of what to do, which in the end didn’t really work out for either of them in both cases.
Look at the bigger picture for a moment, and you can see that actually, each person had their own plan for their life, and relationships, as a whole. Each of us does this. How do we create this plan and how do we know whether it is the right one? Once they break up, do they keep their plan, only to fail again when they discover that the next person doesn’t fit it either? And if they change their plan, does their future relationship change? Or is it just a different version of the same pattern?

Like everyone, I’ve made many plans in my life; for my career, my romantic life, my travels, my friends – some worked, some didn’t. Actually, now I can see that most of them didn’t. But when I met the Aura, I discovered what my plan should be, how to create it, and how to adapt it; and things have never been the same. It is very exciting.

Thank you for accompanying me on this diary of my journey! :-)”

Enjoy it and if you feel for that, leave us your ideas, suggestions… about the post and/or the blog!!

With love,

Laura

Creating our lives together – but, are we really? Part 2

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It is the first time in my life I clearly create and look for places where to create in my life. In almost all the areas in my life I try to develop something new.

This is a completely new approach in matter of relationships, but also in matter of life. Before, my idea of a good and fun relationship was based in coffees outside, dinners and going out to dance, to the cinema or to the theater  Along my whole life I have spent a lot of hours talking about life, love, relationships… but really very little time creating a new reality, bringing new directions to what I didn’t like, supporting or being supported in my development… And when there was creation involve, there was a lot of judgment and criticism. There was almost not space to try. I was too busy talking and enjoying other’s creations.

I don’t always reject to enjoy a good documentary, book or movie. But now my approach is different. My priorities have changed. Now my first option is to create something, to experience the moment of creation and development. And after, if the suggestion of materials that come from others are interesting and are bringing something new to my life, I can choose to go for it. I also nurture myself with their ideas, but for first time in my life, this is not what is leading my life.

As the time is passing and I am including more and more my own creations in my life as well as the creations I develop with other people in cooperation, I can see in how many areas of my life I was just not even considering the option of doing something new by myself.

The fear of not being good enough was blocking me so much that it wasn’t even an option. By then I was following what others had created instead of trying myself lightly, smiley and playful. I was not able to feel like this at all. I was even having big troubles to say a joke!! You know… I was feeling shy. It was just something for others, but not for me, I said to myself so many times!

Along the last year I have learnt how to try this creative approach without judging myself constantly and feeling bad about myself.

I have spent the last year learning and (in a way) cleaning my life from nonsense’s. This process have brought lots of fun, laughter, awareness and love.

Now, for first time in my life I write letters to my mother and grandma. Instead of  buying a nice postcard I draw it every time myself with the colors I want to bring to their life’s.

Another example is in my job as Spanish teacher. I have include Art and Creativity as a new way to learn the language (this idea came and has been developed as part of an amazing guidance that I reactive from Orel and Healaura). Right now I am constantly creating with my students and for me student a new reality. Every session is like a small Universe in which I bring to my students and I also create with them:

–        A new experience.

–        A new situation that is different that what they usually have in their lives: a supportive environment free of judgment and criticism.

–        A space for fun and creation together, in cooperation.

–        A new way to learn a language…

I have experienced teaching both ways: the conventional one in which we follow a book, exercises from different sources… And the one in which creativity is the base to learn. Even though I always tried to be creative and make them have good time in the sessions, the difference between both is enormous.

Now, after the sessions my students (of all ages) feel full of energy and ready to move the world with both hands!! Ready to face any situation it will appear in their life’s!! And the most amazing is that I feel the same way after the sessions!!

There is creation; there is movement and also aura in every session.

This fact means for me already to create a different reality. In my pasts jobs I needed to spend hours in the weekend to recover from the licking and sucking of energy I was suffering along the whole week. I remember many Saturdays going to sleep after eating (the famous Spanish nap) and not being able to wake up for 4 hours! This was a lot of time of my life invested in recovering from my job. At the end, this time was an extension of my job. So I was in my profession much more hours that what I even thought.

Now, when I finish working I have energy to move my life, to create, to experience more and more, to live! I need to sleep less than half of what I slept in my life as average. With 4 to 5 hours I manage my day happily and enjoying it.

And this is just an example.

In my relationship with my partner we are also in constant creation. Sometimes he brings me a surprise like the poem you can read below, which brought a big smile and a lot of love to my heart. (He just speaks a very little Spanish learnt by hearing me speaking it and by songs he plays). There are many other things that I will try to show you little by little. Now you are the observers of what my relationship 🙂

Actually some of the things I am showing you are part of my private couple life. Like this one:

Aug 2012 Poem From Yam

I have decided that my life will be a reflection of what I create myself, with my partner and family, with my friends, the planet and the surrounding I am in contact with.

I am in a living movement in which everyday can look different and exciting if I decide to!

I am living my own creation!

For first time in my life, I am truly living and leading my own life.

Ready to continue moving forward!

Laura